today i am thankful for...photobooth

So. It's November.  Time to be thankful for the little things in life! Tonight it's taking a break from French homework to take silly photobooth pictures.  Yeah, I'm in college.  I'm mature.

Now, back to that homework...

a view from our table

Instead of doing something productive like packing or sleeping, I have been lured into my iPhoto folders.  I couldn't help but post these pictures from my freshman through senior years' (mostly lunch) tables.  The thing I love about my group of friends (and oh how I love them, especially after a lovely "going away" get together tonight at my house) is that we welcome everyone with open arms.  Yes, we were that kind of table.  The table that people stop by to say hi, and end up sitting there every day for the rest of the year.  There was something magical about our group that attracted all kinds of people.  Sure, some of them came and went after a semester or two, but fortunately the good ones usually stuck around.  It all started with me, Erin, Domenico, and Kate. 

FRESHMAN YEAR

Last day of 9th grade.

Oh my, look at that goober.  I haven't changed much at all.

SOPHOMORE YEAR

Erin and Domenico.  Have I ever mentioned that two of my best friends have been happily married for five years?

Okay, so they're not married (although I told them after each snapshot I took--and there were many--that it was for their "Save the Date"), but FIVE YEARS, GUYS!  The only boy I've liked that long is Harry Potter.  Let's give them a hand!

JUNIOR YEAR

Ah, the library.  Every morning we would go there to chat, study miniature vocab cards last minute (well, in my case at least), and take silly photos (I was photo editor of the yearbook, so Bernard was my right-wing man).

Dahlya. Some things never change.

Typical Domenico facial expression.  Typical Nathan sunglass-wearing.

Rylee and Eric.  Cutest couple to come out of Junior year (or at least I think that's when they became a couple?  Seriously, I think my group of friends has some of the coolest, longest-lasting couples I have ever encountered...).

Junior year was when I discovered my immense love of hats (and photography, thanks to yearbook).  Oh yes, I was soooo artsy.  I mean, look at that beret and that thoughtful gaze.

Rachel is just the cutest redhead alive.

SENIOR YEAR

That awkward moment when I accidentally proposed to Melanie... The only pictures from the lunch table I can find are from Valentine's Day, probably because I was all over the place for most lunches due to yearbook (and Bernard, my yearbook camera, was no longer my man).  Holidays were special though.  My friends and I are a crafty bunch and many homemade treats were exchanged during holidays.

Thankfully, Phoebe shared my extreme love for the frilly holiday.  Although she would show up with yummy treats on any given day!

Also, here are some pics from "Bro Awareness Day"...

MORAL OF STORY:  Yep, we are awesome.

#WhenIWas13

Sometimes Twitter is really cool and entices you to break out your embarrassing journal from when you were 13.  And sometimes, said journal makes you laugh so hard and loudly that you are gasping for air at how ridiculously (more) immature you used to be.  

Here are some real gems (I give you full permission to laugh hysterically) from seventh-grade me:

"If I am going to get into Harvard, I need some rest.  Night."  Haaaaaaaaaah!

"Girls are feroshus (haha can't spell) beasts."  I've never been a good speller, you guys.  But yeah, sometimes they are, especially when they are emotional thirteen year olds who can't spell.

"Eww!  Boys!  Eww!  NO!"  Wiser words have never been written.

"I painted a heart.  My heart.  It's light, but surrounded by darkness closing in."  I CAN'T.  I JUST CAN'T.  THIS IS TOO MUCH.

"We'd fix this.  You know, like at Disneyland?  They renovate rides all the time.  It's the same ride it's always been, but hey, it's getting fixed--bettered.  Like...Pimp My Ride?" What was I wanting to fix, you ask?  A stain on the carpet?  A tear in my favorite skirt?  Nope, my "love life".  Pssh!

"Lately I haven't been thinking about you all that much, but..."  But...I was thinking about you enough to write you a letter that I would never send to you.  But seriously, I never think about you.  Except for this one time I'm spilling my heart out to you in a letter.

"Okay, so now I know why teachers give us so much homework.  To keep us sane."  Ah, junior high drama.  Ah, how I don't miss it.

Although some things never change, embarrassing as I can get:

"What to wear?!!??  Hmm.  I wanna wear my new (old) brooch.  I'll get my whole überchic nerdy glam girl going on.  I'm thinking my lavendar top that is a little tighter at the waist.  Hmm.  For bottoms?  A skirt obviously.  But which one?  

Scratch that.  Something totally new." SO THAT IS WHAT MY STYLE IS! It's "überchic nerdy glam".  Finally, I can put a name to it.

"I love old stuff.  Old stuff makes me happy.  You know what else makes me happy?  Sleep."  A thousand times yes.

"Ok, so all I needed was a little Starbucks and Arcade Fire and I'm as good as new."  Amen to that.

Alright, now that I've sufficiently humiliated myself for the night, I will say my farewell for now.  I just couldn't help but share how silly I was then.  I mean, I'm still silly, but not in the same ways.  Middle school was just the weirdest situation ever, let me tell you...  I try to block it out of my memory most of the time, but it's good for a few (dozen) laughs.  

goosebumps, stress, and wrock & roll: 2 more days

If I counted the number of times I've gotten goosebumps over the last couple of weeks, I would be in the bazillion digits.  The things you do to me, Harry Potter.  The things you put me through!

My excitement has somewhat turned into terror, which is heightened by the ever-looming prospect of growing up and dealing with college business.  I feel like my wedding is this Thursday night at midnight!  I am BEYOND excited.  It's all I can think about.  But then I start worrying about getting there on time (people already waiting in line: YOU ARE GIVING ME ANXIETY), getting enough seats for my friends, having enough time to finish the seventh book (I just have to, you know?), finding time to make more Butterbeer cupcakes, etc...  It's all very silly, I realize this, but the end of the Harry Potter books and films signify a giant, enormous, bigger-than-Hagrid-and-Grawp-combined step in my life:  Growing up (or trying to, at least), moving out, and going to college.  And it's hitting me.  Harder than a bludger.  I'm as ready to go to college as any other incoming freshman, but emotionally at the moment, being in third grade reading Harry Potter for the first time sounds pretty appealing at the moment... I miss getting away with bringing a book out to dinner.

Venting aside, I happily wore my Harry & the Potters shirt today (I was a subtle Hermione on Sunday), jammed out to their first album (that I bought in fifth or sixth grade--not sure which) and A Very Potter Musical (for the 39482th time in the past few weeks, I'm sure of it) in the car, and purchased what seemed to be the last copy of the Harry Potter Empire at Barnes & Noble.  I went in looking for the Harry Potter Entertainment Weekly, but didn't find it.  It's all good, because Empire is beautiful!  If I lived in the UK, I would definitely have a subscription.

And now I leave you with some wrock (that's wizard rock for you muggles out there) songs, because all I've been listening to lately is AVPM, Harry & the Potters, and wrock songs.

This last one is so beautiful.

desert summers

i think you are adorable

So, I have been totally fangirling all over the place with Darren Criss. It is probably unhealthy, but even my nine year old sister can't resist his charm, so I think that makes it more acceptable.  Alrthough it is kind of troubling how much I relate to this tumblr post:

"Darren Everett Criss. Setting unattainably high standards for men since 1987."

Because yeah, Darren--SO NOT FAIR!  How am I possibly going to find another you?

My PERFECT man?  Well...

The short version:

• Darren Criss

The long version:

• Good sense of humor
• Intelligent
• Open-minded
• Compassionate
• Dog-lover (Actually, animal-lover in general.)
• Musically-inclined (Who doesn't love musicians? I mean--let's get serious.)
• Dark curly hair (My weakness)
• SCRUFF (My other weakness)
• Silly goose (I am pretty silly, you guys.)
• Fun to be with
• Photographer (A blogging side-kick, anyone?)
• Can cook me delicious meals
• Will watch my favorite TV shows with me (and only make fun of me a little)
• MUST LOVE HARRY POTTER (Or no. Just no.)

Now, is this really so much to ask?  Probably.  But I know someone pretty close to this description is out there making a list that looks a little like this:

• Short (Who needs tall girls anyway...)
• Creative
• Can sew (Who doesn't love sewers?  I mean--let's get serious.)
• Compassionate about all living things
• Owns 500324 dresses
• Blogs (I love reading blogs!)
• Dark, curly hair (My weakness)
• SMALL FEET (My other weakness)
• Silly goose
• Can bake me delicious treats
• MUST LOVE HARRY POTTER (Or no.  Just no.)

In the meantime, I am regretting not buying a "I ♥ DC" shirt while I was in DC like four years ago, because now I could say it stands for Darren Criss.  Ah, regrets.

only kate can make me look this cool

Today I tagged along with Kate to take someone's engagement photos (which turned out adorable by the way) and she snapped a few of me while the couple was changing wardrobe. She made me look cool. She has always been good at this. She took this picture of me a few years ago. I think it is currently the only photograph in existence that makes me look this darn cool.

Anyway, just sayin'.  She's good.

things to bake this winter break

1. Festive macarons

photo via tumblr

2. Peppermint and/or chocolate-dipped marshmallows 

found via tumblr

3. Some kind of soufflé

found via tumblr

Ugh, why is it that most of the baking recipes I lust over and want to dominate are French and tres difficil?  I am still waiting for the day my macarons put up no fight and say, "Touché, Kaylie.  You win. We are very beautiful and also quite delicious.  Enjoy our perfect pieds (feet)!  Congrats on your hard work and diligence." Well, until then...


Happy Holidays
xoxo

confession: i am secretly blair waldorf

...or at least her nerdy doppelganger.

Evidence:

We both wish we were in an Audrey Hepburn movie.

(Although I've never had an Audrey dream sequence like Blair often does, I do have a trench coat and have tried this hairstyle from Breakfast at Tiffany's many of times myself.) 

We both like to pretend we're modern-day Marie Antoinettes



We both have this dress

(but mine isn't Marc Jacobs...)

We both know the value of a good hat

(not to mention retro clothes)

We both ♥ French macarons

(beaucoup, beaucoup!)

And most importantly, we like to be in control of things, whether it's planning a party or choosing the perfect outfit for each situation--because yes, it does matter.

XOXO,

K

j'adore les hamburgers

Recently my friend Erin pointed out that I seem to love all things that are miniature or abnormally large.  So when I saw mini hamburger buns at Trader Joe's, I had to get them to make burgers!  Despite my past of being a vegetarian, then a pescetarian, then a only-eat-meat-when-it's-served-for-dinner-at-home...ian, lately ALL I want to eat is burgers and hotdogs.  How funny is that?  There is something about a good burger, a Coke, and the summer sunshine that I haven't been able to resist these past couple of months.  So I sauteed some crimini mushrooms and cut up some tomatoes from my sister's friend's garden, and made a mini burger.  Add some pita chips and hummus and life is good.

it's earth day and springtime--more than enough reasons to read some poetry, eh?

i thank You God for most this amazing
day:for the leaping greenly spirits of trees
and a blue true dream of sky;and for everything
wich is natural which is infinite which is yes
(i who have died am alive again today,
and this is the sun's birthday;this is the birth
day of life and love and wings:and of the gay
great happening illimitably earth)

how should tasting touching hearing seeing
breathing any-lifted from the no
of all nothing-human merely being
doubt unimaginable You?
(now the ears of my ears awake and
now the eyes of my eyes are opened)
 
-E.E. Cummings
 
 
Minott, Lee, Willard, Hosmer, Meriam, Flint,
Possessed the land, which rendered to their toil
Hay, corn, roots, hemp, flax, apples, wool, and wood.
Each of these landlords walked amidst his farm,
Saying, "'Tis mine, my children's, and my name's.
How sweet the west wind sounds in my own trees;
How graceful climb those shadows on my hill;
I fancy those pure waters and the flags
Know me as does my dog: we sympathize,
And, I affirm, my actions smack of the soil."
Where are those men? Asleep beneath their grounds,
And strangers, fond as they, their furrows plough.

Earth laughs in flowers to see her boastful boys
Earth proud, proud of the earth which is not theirs;
Who steer the plough, but cannot steer their feet
Clear of the grave.—
They added ridge to valley, brook to pond,
And sighed for all that bounded their domain,
"This suits me for a pasture; that's my park,
We must have clay, lime, gravel, granite-ledge,
And misty lowland where to go for peat.
The land is well, —lies fairly to the south.
'Tis good, when you have crossed the sea and back,
To find the sitfast acres where you left them."
Ah! the hot owner sees not Death, who adds
Him to his land, a lump of mould the more.
Hear what the Earth says:

EARTH-SONG.

Mine and yours,
Mine not yours.
Earth endures,
Stars abide,
Shine down in the old sea,
Old are the shores,
But where are old men?
I who have seen much,
Such have I never seen.

The lawyer's deed
Ran sure
In tail
To them and to their heirs
Who shall succeed
Without fail
For evermore.

Here is the land,
Shaggy with wood,
With its old valley,
Mound, and flood.—
But the heritors—
Fled like the flood's foam;
The lawyer, and the laws,
And the kingdom,
Clean swept herefrom.

They called me theirs,
Who so controlled me;
Yet every one
Wished to stay, and is gone.
How am I theirs,
If they cannot hold me,
But I hold them?

When I heard the Earth-song,
I was no longer brave;
My avarice cooled
Like lust in the chill of the grave.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson


Be nice to yo' Mama Earth

-Me

I want to be you, Sofia Coppola

And not because you are married to the lead singer of Phoenix (although it doesn't hurt) and live in Paris.  Okay.  Maybe because you live in Paris.  But the thing is, I am going through this crazy, loony phase.  And I wish I could say with confidence that I know that this is what I want to do with my life (I'll get to that), but my practicality gets ahold of my this far-out dream and holds a firm grip.

So, I've always known (I can say this, because since Kindergarten I've wanted "to be an author") that whatever I end up doing with myself will include writing of some manner.  And the past few years I've become increasingly more interested in taking pictures, so I've come to the consensus that I will end up making that a habit at the least.

Now, thanks to my first (and second--the next night) viewing of Annie Hall this January (seems so far when you think of all the movies I've watched since), it seems that I have become more of a cinephile than I ever thought imaginable.  I mean, I thought I liked movies before.  Now I'm going loony bins!  I am going completely loony bins.  What have you done to me, Woody Allen?

Because now I have this lunatic, crazy, completely insane desire to be a director.  Not just a run-of-the-mill director, the Wes Anderson kind--you know, basically do everything, from production, writing, directing, music selection, and cinematography...The whole crazy, insane business.  Heck, why not sew up the whole wardrobe?

Clearly, I AM OUT OF MY MIND.  But this is what I daydream about these days.  In my sleep-deprived mind late at night after watching movie after movie for the third night in a row, making films seems like the answer to my love of writing, photography, creating a story with color and design, and of course, there's no escaping it--having things my way.  I'll try to settle down about it, but it's taking over my thoughts these days.

When people ask me what I want to be, I usually just say, "happy"; now I'm beginning to realize that to be happy, is to be who you want to be.  And who do I want to be?  Well, I know the title says Sofia Coppola, but what I really want to be is SO MANY THINGS.  It's slightly ridiculous.

Ah, to be a teenager.  We really are crazy, aren't we?

so

This week is a little crazy, man.  Way too many free response questions and multiple choice exams and 40 minute essays for my taste.  Yet this nasty specimen of a week will, in fact, make the weekend after it so, so good.  ESPECIALLY if Friday is your 17th brithday.  And so I am persevering.  And I think it's a good thing to be aware of the craziness of life, because then you can step back and look at it and say, Well, that's a little crazy, and commence to enjoy all of its quirks.

Because I know for a fact that in a year I will be thinking one winter day as I walk past the smelly mullberry tree outside the yearbook room, "Oh my goodness, I miss that day in AP Bio when we classified the plants around campus and Erin and I found out the smelly tree outside the yearbook room is a Mulberry tree."  And for this the free response questions will all be worth it, just for that moment of happy nostalgia (and for all the Simon & Garfunkel and Coldplay we got to listen to during labs).  Because when you have a safe distance from the past, doesn't it look so attractive?  So why not have that mindset right now?  Sometimes it's hard; I know this.  But it's definitely worth the effort.

OR MAYBE I am a little crazy.  Maybe that's it.  But oh well.

guess what

Just so you readers from Facebook are aware, NO, I HAVE NOT BEEN ON FACEBOOK POSTING NOTES!  This came up at lunch today and I was laughing because the last status I left was that I gave up Facebook for Lent, then all these blogposts are apparently popping up on there (because I have my blog linked to Facebook), so I look like a crazy note-posting liar!  Hah!  So, just a FYI, to save some face.

And so this post isn't a complete waste, I give you this gnome I took a picture of in Ireland.  Isn't he cute?

i don't know what to say

...other than that you should avoid taking a sip of anything (must less a sierra mist to settle your stomach--I've been sick the last few days) before viewing this....

I was in hysterics for a full two minutes (partially due to an untimely sip of sierra mist--I had no idea what I was getting myself into)...  Overall, a very good thing after feeling so miserable at school today (Thank goodness it was a half-day).

some days I think too much about not thinking enough

So, I am transfering Word documents to my flash drive (killer essay going down here), when I find myself distracted by old documents.  So, I am reading them now.

And they make me a little sad.  Because, two-three-four years ago, I had a lot more time to think about things.  I questioned everything.  Every.  Single.  Thing.  And I genuinely cared about finding a conclusion.  I was really stuck on forming opinions on everything and stringing lines together in my head for poems.  Geez Louise, I'm making it sound like I was a really pretentious middle-schooler.  Maybe I was.  Maybe that's why I haven't written poetry for so long.  Maybe I can't take myself seriously anymore, because it embarresses me to see others take themselves so seriously. Could it just be that I am content with not having an answer for everything?  Perhaps. 

I blame it all on homework.

But hey, at least it's got me thinking.


Pretentious 7th-grade thoughts:

"You know when you're little and everything is just so simple? All you want is everyone to be nice and share their toys and not pull your hair right off your head like a wig. Now it seems like all you can really ask of anyone is for them to be happy. But what happens when they aren't happy? I don't know; I guess you can't ask anything of anyone but yourself."


 "I always regret not doing what I may regret."  I literally have this saved as a document...This kills me!

And what would middle school be without writing poetry during class?

"we search
to discover
empty thoughts
waiting to turn to more
hidden beneath
another time
in the bottom drawer
yet when we find
a simple scrap
it's only but
a memory
stripped of fact
nothing
more than before"

Well...enough about self-discovery.  I need some sleep.

I might be crazy

but I LOVE Valentines Day.  I know that people who aren't in a relationship are supposed to take the holiday as a slap in the face, but I can't help but embrace it.  I even have this weird tradition of buying a book each hearts day.  I mean, a whole holiday dedicated to hearts and sweets?  I'm in!

By the way, I watched Annie Hall the other night and adored it.  Adore is an understandment.  I watched it again the next night, if that tells you anything.  I hate to admit that it was my first Woody Allen film, but you have to start sometime and that time was two days ago.  Hah!  Now that I think of it, I have been watching an abnormal amount of movies lately.  I think I need a new sewing project to keep busy with, or something...

photo, outside the tower of london summer 2009

Amélie

J'ai aimé bien!  C'est un film rigolo, pensif, et unique.  Je le verrais encore!

Okay, I couldn't resist attempting to blog en français, just this once.  I probably made 57 grammar mistakes. Yes, in just three sentences.  It's possible.  But hey, I have to use my 3.5 years of stuttering French for something.

P.S. Amélie totally made me long for my short hair again... Ugh. This happens at the drop of a hat. I have to think about someone with pretty long hair to stop me from going to a pair of scissors... My mom would kill me.

picture by Kate this past March

The Royal Tenenbaums

It has always really embarressed me that I hadn't seen The Royal Tenenbaums.  Ever since a night a couple of years ago at Olive + Ivy when Nicole and one of her friends configured a list of movies I must see and it was on the top of the list, I have unsuccessfully caught it on one of our multiple movie channels to record.

Finally, today, I got my chance.  We dropped by Blockbuster and I hunted it down.  At last.  And when I say hunt down, I mean foolishly scramble the aisles, my eyes darting everywhere--because in result of said movie channels, I am not so agile in the art of renting movies.

But my attempts beared fruitful--I even found Amelie, another movie I remember to be on the list and another movie I am sad to say I haven't seen.

BUT THIS WILL CHANGE.  One down (The Royal Tenenbaums), one to go (Amelie). 

And yes, I loved it.  So, so, so much.

it's christmas in my room!